儿童的生命教练

Children's Life Coach Program

第一堂课:《【教育】vs【激励】战胜恐惧》
Conquering Fear through Education not Motivation

欢迎收看第一集
Alright welcome to chapter 1

在此集,我们将谈谈恐惧
so chapter 1 we will talk about fear

正当感到害怕尤其是在学游泳时
when it comes to having fear especially when comes to 

学习游泳不只是像在学习任何一个科目一样
learning swimming, it’s not just about learning 

因为学习的任何科目都已被分解成步骤来学
any subject, because learning any subject is more about the breakdown

每当面临到害怕是时,您都必须帮助他们克服
but when it comes to fear, you need to solve their fear

每当学生恐惧时
and whenever when student have fear

他们最常会说的话是:
the most common thing they will share things like

“我做不到”,“我不要做了”
“I can’t do it” “I don’t want to do it”

可老师常犯的错误是
and what’s the mistake that a teacher often make is 

当我们试图以 “不,您可以的” 来
when we try to motivate them by saying 

激励他们的时候他们很快的
“no you can!” as soon they will say

会回应说“不,我不行”
“no i cannot” then you will say

您就会说,”可以的,您相信我,您可以做到的”
“can, you just trust me, you will be able to do it”

他们就会回答说 “不,我做不到”
as soon they will say “no, I can’t”

所以当这样反反复复的来回激励那个人
so if you keep going back and forth motivating that person

可以,不可以,可以,不可以。。那就会耗更多的时间
can, cannot, can, cannot, it will take a long time

比如,跳进一个很深的水里
for example, jumping into deep water

我们有12尺深的泳池, 差不多是两个人半的高度
we have a 12 feet pool, its two and a half times of a person height

所以如果您没尝试过跳进游泳池,你会感到害怕
so if you never jump into a pool before is a very scary feeling

因此您反复来回
so if you go back and forth 

”我可以的,我不可以,我可以,我不可以。。”
“I can’t, I can, I cant, I can”

这将会耗掉更长的时间
its going to take a very long time

 而最好替代激励的方式是教育
and whats a good replacement for motivation is education

教育是非常重要的因为
education is very important where

您只需专注在于如何把它分解成步骤
all you need to do is focus on the break down of steps

打个比方当人感到恐惧时
for example when someone has a fear

您必需找出他们害怕的原因
you have to try to see what causes that fear 

人怕水的原因有很多
there is so many reason people are scared of water

可能是对沉水有恐惧
it could be the fear of sinking

他们害怕沉下去以后
people afraid that when you are sinking down

上不回来
they cant come up anymore

害怕沉下去后会溺死
they feel that they will drown when they sink 

有些害怕坠落
they are afraid of falling, falling from high places

从高处坠落是很恐怖的感觉甚至有些害怕因跳下水
is a very scary feeling, some are afraid of pain 

而造成种种的痛
when they are jumping 

“啊不知道为什么会痛,我不喜欢痛”
“ahh don’t know why there is pain, I dont like the pain”

所以人会有恐惧的原因有很多
so there are many reasons why people have fear

如果您可以一一分解
and if you ever can break it down part by part

比如害怕沉水
for example you are afraid of sinking 

我们就让他们了解其实沉水是好的
we show them sinking is a good thing

当您沉落到水底时您可以
when you sink down you can use the floor to

更快的用脚踢上水面上, 泳池的底部是您的‘朋友’
jump up even faster, the floor is you friend

我们也可以示范让您知道,当您沉落时
we can show you that when you sinking

憋着您的气,您会自然的浮回水面上
you hold your breath, you will be able to float up naturally 

这样的解释可以让他们了解
that takes away the fear of sinking

沉水其实一点都不可怕
they will understand actually sinking is good

害怕跳水, 那我们可以从矮的地方开始比如从小楼梯起
fear of falling, we start from small places, small ladder

如果学生还是不敢从高处跳
if you don’t dare to jump from a higher place

那就在扶着泳池里的楼梯
start from sitting down on the ladder

尝试跳下水
jump down from the ladder

接下来的是坐在泳池旁边,脚在水里然后跳下
then sit on the wall when your legs still in the water 

就这样一步步得的增加高度
jump down from the wall then a bit higher wall

一直到站着跳下水
jump down then without sitting just standing 

或者是半蹲,而不是坐着了 把这些分解成小小的步骤
or half squat, breaking down into small pieces

当学生开始了解其实跳进水的感觉
so when people start to understand actually the falling 

不管站着还是坐着
is the same whether im sitting im standing slight higher

它的感觉其实是一样的
is the same feeling when you fall

害怕跳水时,水进到鼻子会痛
fear of pain when you fall down water goes into your nose

该怎么做呢? 把水从鼻子里
you feel so painful, what’s the counter?

呼出来
you blow

当下水的时候,只需呼气
whenever you drop down you blow 

这样鼻子就不会进水, 就不痛了
there will be no pain

当您一个一个地去了解和解决学生的恐惧
so when you solve one by one of their fear

您会意识
you start to realise you do not need to 

其实您不需要特地激励学生跳下去
motivate them to take the plunge to jump down 

学生自己了解了以后会自己尝试
they will say they start to understand that let me give it a try

学生需要的是一步一步来
all you need to do is take your time 

当学生准备好了
when you are ready you just jump 

您会看到他们就会激发自己去跳进水
you see they will motivate themself to jump 

因为有了知识, 他们了解了
when they have education

所以老师不需要一直想着如何激发学生
so don’t make a mistake of constantly looking 

专注在于如何教育他们
for motivation, focus more on what’s the education 

让学生自我激励
that i can give so the person can be self-motivated 

的学跳水
to take the plunge 

再看看功课, 这里有个功课您可以做
let’s look at homework, what’s the homework you can do

如果想要解除一个人的恐惧
I think inorder for you to solve someone’s fear

或者是要个人做他们觉得困难的事情
or you want somebody to do something that they

对他们来说太难了
feel that is impossible for them, it’s too difficult for them

最好的方式是您自己先尝试克服您的恐惧
think one of the best way is try to conquer a fear yourself

找出一件您恐惧的事
find what is the thing that you are very afraid of

然后挑战它
challenge it

如果您怕高,就尝试攀岩
If you are afraid of height, try rock climbing

怕水, 就尝试游泳
afraid of water, try learning how to swim

怕蛇, 可以去动物园尝试触摸一个动物
if you are afraid of snakes, try going into zoo start petting one 

这些累计的经验将会挑战您·,
all this experience will help challenge you

也会协助您了解
will help show you as well what if someone

如果有个人想要激励您
is that person trying to motivate you to

好让您征服您害怕的
conquer something you are afraid of 

他们会给予您怎样的分解
what is the break down they have give you

他们怎样激励您,怎样教育您
how do they motivate you, how do they educate you 

所以下次当您教学生或孩子时
so the next time when you teach your student

要会有同情心
your child, you start to have the empathy

您会开始了解 “哦 我不可以”
you start to understand “oh I can’t”

您知道那是什么样的感受
you totally know how that feels

您选择的用词会有所改善
your choice of words will improve 

您的同理心会有所改善
your compassion will improve

您的人性知道还有什么
your humanity in knowing that what are the 

仍然可以分解
small things I can still break down

因此,那个人就会明白
so that, that person can understand

好过一直喊 “您可以做到的”
rather than i need to “hey you can do it”

 “您可以做到的”
giving all the hura 

尝试征服您的恐惧
try that conquer your fear 

有一个很好的例证, 我有一个很要好的朋友
a very good example of that was i have a very good friend 

她是国家游泳队选手但是她很怕
she is a national swimmer and she is really afraid to 

从跳水的高跳板跳下
jump down from a platform, from a very high platform where people do diving

一直到今天她还是有这个恐惧,为何呢
and why is that, until today she still have that fear

因为以前她的教练一直使用恐吓的方式
is because there was a time where the teacher 

来激发她
use fear to motivate

“如果您不跳我们就不用下课”
“if you down jump down, we will not end the class”

“您必须跳”
“you gonna jump”

最终她花了 3个小时才跳下水
and she had to take 3 hours before she actually jump down

她非常讨厌这跳水的感觉
when she jump she hated that feeling 

持续到现在她都不再选择跳水
until now she will never jump again 

为何会有如此的选择是因为
and why is she ok with that because she

她自己的一个想法
use that as a motivation for herself 

“我必须要听教练说的话”
“I need to listen to everything the coach said”

“我不会去定义因为我不想再跳了”
“I will not define the teacher because i don’t want to jump again”

无论我们实现了多少,我们还是会有
but no matter how much we achieve we still have 

少许的害怕,长期伴随着我们
a few fears behind us that stuck for a long time

我们需要克服每一个恐惧
we want to be able to cure every fear 

我们必须学会如何征服每个恐惧
we want to be able to conquer every fear that we have 

一点一滴地克服直到没有恐惧可以阻止我们
bit by bit until there is noting that can stop us

当恐惧再也不能阻止我们的时候
when there is really nothing that can stop us 

我们就能无阻碍的学习任何东西
we are free to learn anything

这是我给予您的功课
that’s where I want you to try this homework. 

重点回顾

学习一门科目是关于分解步骤
Learning a subject is more about the breakdown.

但当面对恐惧时,您必须去解决它。
But when it comes to fear, you need to solve the fear.

用教育替代激励
Replace Motivation with Education

教育专注于分解学习步骤
Education focus on the breakdown of steps

人会感到恐惧
People have fear

是因为他们对事物缺乏知识。
when they lack of education towards somethings.

当学生有了有了知识
When student have education

了解了,他们会自我激励。
they will self-motivate.

解除恐惧最好的方式之一就是
One of the best way to solve fear

找出一件您非常恐惧的事,克服它,挑战它。
is to find the thing that you are very afraid of, conquer it and challenge it.

当我们克服每一个恐惧
When we able to conquer every fear we have

我们就能无阻碍的学习任何东西。
we are free to learn anything.

下一堂课:

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儿童的生命教练 叶友泉 网络课程

Children’s Life Coach Program

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